My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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