I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
zippers are such a cool invention
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
