So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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