ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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