Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Randomize
