margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
