I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just invented taco cereal.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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