Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize