I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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