BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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