I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
