Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
