We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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