If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
