I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
