It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
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