That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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