I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
