i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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