If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize
