I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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