got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
