you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
