I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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