I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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