I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
