I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize