yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
