i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize