i jhust puked up my retainher.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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