if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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