She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
id be glad to
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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