so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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