Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Randomize
