he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
My hand turned me down
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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