OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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