I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize