I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
