Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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