This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
