Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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