I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize