and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
