i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm sobbing to NWA
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize