So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
He felt like a one man threesome
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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