Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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