Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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