Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
