like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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