He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
