maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Found the puke drawer
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
